Dealing with Rejection and Disapointment
I once heard someone say, there are three things that eventually confront all humans, life, death, and rejection. Arguably the forth one could be taxes, however, that's for another article. Unfortunately, the time will come when something doesn't go our way. In fact, sometimes it goes in the entirely opposite direction. At that point, we confront the bitter blow of rejection - to a lesser or greater degree. This leaves us asking how to deal with rejection.
In short, rejection is an inevitable part of our life. Fear of rejection is one of the most powerful thoughts and emotions many of us harbor. It can cause damage to our confidence, decision making and personality, not to mention health. When someone rejects us, we have a propensity to feel so small, unloved, worthless, insecure and insignificant. We can even lose a sense of who we are. Rejection can impact us so strongly, that it sometimes leads us to behave in ways we wouldn't otherwise behave in. The bottom line is, we've all experienced being rejected and felt the depths of its pain.
Rejection comes in various forms and may occur even in the smallest ways. However, the funny thing is, we tend to blame ourselves for being rejected even if we logically know that it's the other person's choice and not ours. The way we deal with rejection is key to upholding our self-respect and dignity. No wonder there are vasts amounts of time spent on writing about the subject of rejection and ways to deal with it. Since rejection can come in many expressions, information on how to deal with rejection also varies. There are articles that contain steps on how to handle rejection from a romantic relationship perspective, within a family dynamic, how to deal with rejection at work, as a writer, actor, entrepreneur, parent and so on.
Unfortunately, we cannot avoid rejection but we must keep in mind that it can only be destructive if we internalize it as a negative. If we attribute a meaning to it that then infects our thoughts, belief system and emotions.
How to Deal with Rejection by seeing it clearly
It is truly important to equip ourselves with the right knowledge about dealing with rejection. When we do this, we are then able to ...
- First, see rejection as a friend that builds us up - we can actually use these situations to build our sense of self and internal confidence.
- Secondly, see it as merely a difference of opinion or desire to our own desire/s, ...that's it!.
When we see it clearly enough, we can start to practice walking through the process quickly and without any damaging after effects.
By adjusting our perception and also learning powerful ways of dealing with rejection will dramatically overcome the feelings of low self-esteem and self confidence, both of which usually follow situations of rejection.
How to Deal with Rejection with knowledge
Failure to equip yourself with knowledge about rejection can have a massive effect on the ability to build healthy, trusting relationships.
Again, we know that rejection is undeniably painful and accounts for many of us avoiding situations that run the risk of further disappointment. Avoiding pain and disappointment might sound like a rational and wise strategy. However, at closer inspection, its a trap, a deception, although many fall into this subtle conditioning that leads to unrealized potential and unfulfillment. If you think about it, there are many cemeteries and funeral parlors that are littered with multiple libraries of unfinished books and unwritten lectures, races not run, careers not attempted, dreams that were not realized. This is partly down to the feelings we associate with rejection and the avoidance of them. We build up a fear of the feeling of being rejected, then we consciously and unconsciously avoid situations that may even hint of stirring up those feeling within us. This prevents us from taking the necessary and required risks that lead to living a purpose lead and fulfilled life.
How to Deal with Rejection with Self love
My last advise (within this article) on dealing with rejection is a preventative measure, a state of being that is practiced over a period of time. Since we all like being liked and significant to a degree. Focus on self like (liking all aspects of yourself), then develop this into a strong self love. When this is mature, it anchors you into a state of wholeness regardless of whether you are liked or disliked externally.
I hope you enjoyed this article and more importantly took something from it. There is a lot more to say about this and the associated topics, however tomorrow is another day. I will leave you with a video I made on an associated subject How to Deal with Disappointment - watch this and further widen your understanding, enjoy!
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